Rear Wind Oh!

It is an odd world. When a reality star makes money by breaking wind into jars in order to sell them, it's another example of that.

When there's a report that this same reality star has been hospitalised for overdoing it, then it might just inspire a poem.

"Effervescence of the bowels, my dear,
It's better out than in;
Expel the noxious fumes without
They may ferment within.
Now if you must contain yourself,
but wish to profiteer
Sterilise a jam jar then 
insert it in your rear.

Discharge the methane slowly
and when the jar is full,
Tighten up your sphincter
And check the void is null.
If all is well then screw the lid
Upon the gas-filled jar;
repeat the process 'til you're done -
you'll know the time you are.

Now if you've done your marketing, 
have buyers for your gas,
price up your jars accordingly 
and rake in all that brass.
But don't do this to great excess,
For it's a guarantee
If you progress to demi-johns
You will need A & E."