Widdicombe Fair (Post Election Political Parody)

A number of well-known (UK) Conservative politicians lost their seats in the General Election held on 4th July 2024. This included the short-serving Prime Minister and economic wrecking ball Liz Truss  It seemed an idea to make a list given the Tom Cobbley they made with their misrule.

Tom Pierce parody (Widdicome Fair)

Three cheers, three cheers - let's see who's not there 
There's a long list, a long list we can see 
Of Tories that added to years of despair
With Grant Schapps, Penny Mordaunt, Johnny Mercer, Therese Coffey
Michael Fabricant, Gillian Keegan, and Jacob Rees-Mogg took a fall
They kicked out the Lettuce and all.

It's sad there's Rishi, Hunt, Jenrick, Patel 
Not on the long list, the long list we can see
I'd liked to have seen Braverman there as well
But Grant Schapps, Penny Mordaunt, Johnny Mercer, Therese Coffey
Michael Fabricant, Gillian Keegan, and Jacob Rees-Mogg took a fall
They kicked out the Lettuce and all.

We lost Simon Clarke and we lost Simon Hart
To the long list, the long list we can see
And Tobias Ellwood, Mark Harper depart
Like Grant Schapps, Penny Mordaunt, Johnny Mercer, Therese Coffey
Michael Fabricant, Gillian Keegan, and Jacob Rees-Mogg took a fall
They kicked out the Lettuce and all.

We lost Michelle Donelan, lost Damien Green
To the long list, the long list we can see
And Lucy Fraser, Robert Buckland are seen 
With Grant Schapps, Penny Mordaunt, Johnny Mercer, Therese Coffey
Michael Fabricant, Gillian Keegan, and Jacob Rees-Mogg took a fall
They kicked out the Lettuce and all.

Now note Michael Gove stood down so he won't be
On the long list, the long list we can see
But Jonathan Gullis is one you can see 
With Grant Schapps, Penny Mordaunt, Johnny Mercer, Therese Coffey
Michael Fabricant, Gillian Keegan, and Jacob Rees-Mogg took a fall
They kicked out the Lettuce and all.

Although there's some left, we can enjoy the look
At the long list, the long list we can see
And sing out the names of each ejected crook
Like Grant Schapps, Penny Mordaunt, Johnny Mercer, Therese Coffey
Michael Fabricant, Gillian Keegan, and Jacob Rees-Mogg took a fall
They kicked out the Lettuce and all.